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Wilber's Pennsylvanian Life in 14 Videos/Transcript
This is the transcript for the film, Wilber's Pennsylvanian Life in 14 Videos. THIS MOTION PICTURE HAS BEEN RATED | PG-13 | Parents Strongly Cautioned (MPAA) | | SOME MATERIAL MAY BE INAPPROPRIATE FOR CHILDREN UNDER 13 |@ | Thematic/Suggestive Material, and for Brief Strong Language | BY THE CLASSIFICATION AND RATING ADMINISTRATION (MPAA)@ MOTION PICTURE ASSOCIATION OF AMERICA www.filmratings.com www.mpaa.org Opening Logos *2013 Paramount Pictures logo *2012 Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer logo Chapter 12: Video 12 (A flashback of Catnip Squirrel appears.) Wilber (voice-over): 'Catnip Squirrel. ''(A black and white screen of Daffodil playing with Catnip Squirrel appears.) Daffodil's favorite toy. (A flashback of Catnip Squirrel appears, with shots of Wilber being carried in his pet carrier, Scar hiding Catnip Squirrel on top of three books and then Wilber and Scar.) 'Wilber (voice-over): '''I went on a very exciting and dangerous mission to get Catnip Squirrel back. ''(Catnip Squirrel falls from the shelfs and cut to Wilber with it in three shots.) It's been home ever since, waiting for Daffodil. (A flashback of Wilber running up the stairs appears.) 'Wilber (voice-over): '''And then on Christmas, I thought Santa brought Daffodil back home. ''(Cut to Wilber and Tulip.) But it wasn't her. It was the wrong cat. (Cut to three separate shots Wilber and Tulip.) 'Wilber (voice-over): '''Get this: she calls herself Tulip. VIDEO 12 ''(Cut to Wilber in his bed.) 'Wilber: '''Every day when I wake up from a nap, I think it was all a bad dream. ''(Wilber gets out of bed.) 'Wilber: '''I hop out of bed... ''(Wilber stretches and walks.) 'Wilber: '...do my afternoon stretches... (Wilber sits.) 'Wilber: '...I just chill out for a while. 'Tulip (off-screen, echoing): '''Wilber, are you up yet? What are you doing? '''Wilber: '''Then, the alley kitty's in. Tulip is not your average normal house cat. She's a straight-up-- ''(Cut to Tulip with her head in the toilet.) 'Vrooom (off-screen): '''ALLEY CAT!!! ''(Tulip scratches the door.) 'Wilber (voice-over): '''She scratches the doors... ''(Tulip jumps in the sink.) 'Wilber (voice-over): '...plays in the sink... (Tulip is outside Wilber's litter box.) 'Wilber (voice-over): '...she gets kitty litter all over the floor... (Tulip is in Wilber's bed with him nearby.) 'Wilber (voice-over): '...she tried to sleep in my bed... 'Wilber: '''Yo, leave it! ''(Tulip hops out of his bed, we see them in the kitchen with Wilber eating.) 'Wilber (voice-over): '...and my food, the nerve for her. 'Wilber: '''I'm eating here. One at a time, if there's any left. Probably not. ''(He toots.) Hahahaha! (Tulip is eating.) 'Wilber (voice-over): '''And when I do let her eat, she puts her filthy paws all over the plate and food. '''Tulip: '''Are you talking about me? ''(Tulip is playing with a band in Wilber's water bowl.) 'Wilber (voice-over): '''And she plays in my water bowl too! ''(Wilber is next to a knocked over trash can.) 'Wilber: '''Look at this mess! I didn't think it was possible. But Tulip: she just might be a bigger slob than me. This right here is not working for me. She's definitely gotta go. ''(Wilber and Tulip are in the living room.) 'Wilber: '''I can't find Catnip Squirrel! I know I left it right here. It's gone! '''Tulip: '''Catnip Squirrel? What's a Catnip Squirrel? '''Wilber: '''It's the best toy I've ever seen and you have ever seen and you should never even have seen it. You never shouldn't even ''touch it because it's not yours, it's Daffodil's, that's what it is. 'Tulip: '''I don't know anything about a Catnip Squirrel. I don't even know what it looks like. ''(Wilber walks to the air conditioner.) 'Wilber: '''Ralph. Did you do something with Catnip Squirrel? '''Ralph: '''I would never, ever. You know me better than that, Wilber. ''(Wilber walks to another part of the living room with Tulip following.) 'Wilber: '''Usually I can smell it and find it, but I can't smell anything. It's like advantage without a trace. '''Tulip: '''You won't have to deal with me much longer. '''Wilber: '''Good. '''Tulip: '''This is only temporary. '''Wilber: '''What do you mean by that? '''Tulip: '''You'll find out soon enough. '''Wilber: '''Catnip Squirrel! Where are you?! Catnip Squirrel, where are you? I better keep looking. ''(Wilber walks off-screen.) 'Tulip: '''Uh oh. Chapter 13: Video 13 ''(A screen of Wilber turns appears.) 'Narrator: '''It's Wilber the Cat! ''(The sound of children cheering is heard. Wilber hiccups. The screen of Wilber turns black and white. Hollywood music plays.) Video 13 (Cut to Wilber.) WILBER: I can never forgive you for putting Catnip Squirrel in the toilet! (Cut to Wilber and Tulip.) WILBER: I am not talking to you anymore! (Cut to Wilber and Tulip closer to the stairs.) TULIP: I said I was sorry! (Cut to Tulip heading down the stairs.) TULIP: I'm hungry! (Cut to Wilber heading down the stairs.) WILBER: Ha! Ha! I ate it all! (Cut to Wilber and Tulip in the kitchen. Tulip walks into the living room.) WILBER: Can't you just leave me alone? (Cut to Wilber and Tulip.) TULIP: I told you this is only temporary. (Cut to Wilber.) WILBER: Wait! Do you smell that? (Cut to Wilber again.) WILBER: Ice Cream! (Cut to Wilber with a cup of ice cream.) WILBER: Back off! (Cut to Tulip trying to bite Wilber's tail.) WILBER: I'm warning you! (Cut to Tulip playing and sniffing Wilber's tail. Wilber toots.) TULIP: I thought this was a silent film. (Cut to Wilber and Tulip.) WILBER: Some things can't be silenced! (Cut to Wilber and Tulip.) TULIP: I'll get you back for that! (Cut to Wilber.) WILBER: I dare you to try. (Cut to Wilber entering a hallway and Tulip sniffing the cup of ice cream. She follows Wilber. Cut to Wilber at his litter box.) WILBER: Time to take care of some business. (Cut to Tulip behind Wilber.) WILBER: Look at the mess she made in here! (Cut to Wilber entering his litter box.) WILBER: Finally...some peace and quiet! (Cut to Wilber in his litter box. Tulip walks around it and stares at the audience.) WILBER: Ahhhhhh.... (Cut to Tulip walking close to the litter box.) TULIP: What are you doing? (Cut to Tulip looking inside the litter box.) WILBER: What does it look like?! (Cut to Tulip looking inside the litter box again.) WILBER: Some privacy please! (Cut to Tulip walking away from the litter box.) WILBER: She ruined it. (Cut to Wilber exiting his litter box.) WILBER: Time for a nap. (Cut to Wilber in a shoebox.) TULIP: Revenge is sweet! (Cut to Tulip walking around Wilber.) WILBER: Sniff. Sniff. (Cut to Wilber.) WILBER: What is that awful smell?! (Cut to Tulip.) TULIP: I told you I would get even! (Cut to Wilber.) WILBER: You crop dusted me! (Cut to Tulip.) TULIP: Ha! Ha! (Cut to Wilber and Tulip wagging their tails.) WILBER: You're nothing but a dirty alley cat! (Cut to Tulip walking close to Wilber.) TULIP: You've been mean to me since I got here! (Cut to Wilber and Tulip fighting.) TULIP: I want you to start being nice to me! (Cut to Wilber and Tulip fighting again.) TULIP: Stop calling me names! (Cut to Wilber and Tulip fighting again.) TULIP: And stop eating all the food! (Cut to Tulip walking away from Wilber.) WILBER: Wow! She's a feisty one! (Cut to Tulip running to Wilber.) WILBER: She might be alright after all. (Cut to Tulip playing with a band next to Wilber's leg.) WILBER: Maybe I'll make her stay a little longer. (Cut to Tulip walking away from Wilber.) WILBER: I think I'm starting to like her. (Cut to Wilber and Tulip.) WILBER: She's growing on me. (Cut to Wilber.) WILBER: Maybe I should make a move? (Cut to Wilber and then him and Tulip touching noses.) Chapter 14: Video 14 Video 14 (Cut to Wilber in a box.) 'Wilber: '''I'm back! ''(A cow moo is heard.) So much has happened. (A chicken cluck is heard. Cut to him outside his box.) Did you miss me? (A dog bark is heard.) Excuse me. (Cut to him with a few boxes.) It all started when I saw lots of boxes. I love boxes, you know that, but not these boxes. They could mean only one thing: we were moving. (Cut to him hiding.) I tried to hide, but that didn't work. (A flashback of Daffodil playing with Catnip Squirrel appears.) 'Wilber: '''What if Daffodil comes back? ''(Cut to him, then him with the picture of Daffodil and then a few separate shots of them.) 'Wilber: '''Daffodil was the lost love of my life. She just disappeared one day and I've been searching for her ever since. How will I ever find her now? ''(The picture of Daffodil comes off, four squares with the couch, Wilber's beds, water bowl, food plate and litter box appear and all six disappear. Cut to Vrooom, who disappears.) 'Wilber: '''See you at the new place Vrooom! ''(Cut to Wilber in his carrier.) 'Wilber: '''When I got to the new house, it all made sense. I wanted an answer, and I got one alright. And it sounded like this: ''(Cut to two shots of a baby crying and then cut to shots of it with Wilber.) 'Wilber: '''Oh no. A baby? I smell poop. What was this creature taking all the attention away from me? I'll just have to squeeze in. What about my food? Feed me please! Don't worry about that thing. Umm...nope. Later, kid. ''(Cut to a black and blue vacuum cleaner.) 'Wilber: '''That's not Vrooom. That's an imposter. Vrooom, where are you? ''(Cut to the basement where Vrooom is broken and all dusty.) 'Vrooom (weakly): '''I'm in...(He coughs.)...I'm in the basement. '''Wilber: '''How do I get to the basement? How do I find you? ''(Cut to the baby then to Wilber.) 'Wilber: '''Sometimes, I wished I had a mute button though. ''(Cut to the baby again. The word MUTE appears.) 'Wilber: '''Oh, sweet. ''(Cut to different shots of Wilber and the baby.) 'Wilber: '''Ooh, what smells? That'll be $10 please. She couldn't really go anywhere so, if she got on my nerves. I just walked away. But that didn't last long. This wasn't your normal crawl. To be honest, it was a little scary. Kind of like some weird spider walk. I can't even describe it. I had to get creative. Watch this. Hey kid! There's a cookie under the carpet. She was out of control, throwing stuff out of her way. I just learn to tolerate her. No! Don't! ''(He farts.) I warned you. And then this happened. (Cut to different shots of Wilber and Michelle Moyer.) 'Wilber: '''She was growing up so fast. ''(Michelle speaks gibberish.) That's not my teeth. What are you doing? (Cut to Michelle kissing Wilber on the back.) 'Michelle: '''A kiss. '''Wilber: '''That's not a real camera. '''Michelle: '''Wilber. '''Wilber: '''She always to play. Her favorite game was ''Where's Wilber?. (Cut to different shots of Wilber and Michelle.) 'Michelle: '''Wilber. ''(Cut to different shots of Michelle.) 'Wilber: '''I have to admit, it was fun watching her grow. ''(Cut to different shots of Michelle.) 'Wilber: '''I was so used to her being around, I got bored when she left the house. ''(Cut to different shots of Wilber and Michelle.) 'Wilber: '''Keep it flowing. She found the path to my heart. We actually became pretty good buddies. ''(Cut to different shots of Wilber and Michelle.) 'Wilber: '''That looks like a mini Vrooom. ''(Cut to Vrooom in the basement.) 'Vrooom (weakly): '''Somebody clean my filter! ''(Cut to different shots of Michelle.) 'Wilber: '''I miss you Vrooom! She was getting so smart. When she started school, she was gone for most of the day. ''(Cut to Wilber.) 'Wilber: '''And I was bored. No one to play with. I would just sit at the window all day and wait for her to come home. ''(Cut to different shots of Wilber and Michelle.) 'Wilber: '''And this is when time really started flying by. ''(Cut to different shots of Wilber and Michelle, then Vrooom in the basement.) 'Vrooom: '''I am Vrooom the Vacuum Cleaner, and it is time for me to...(He coughs.)'' I'm getting old Wilber. You're getting old too. (Cut to different shots of Wilber, then to a drawing board, then back to different shots of Wilber.) 'Wilber: '''Maybe Vrooom was right. I was old. Almost 17 in human years. In cat years, I was approaching 90. I started to realize, I didn't have much time left. She's turning nine! But I'm not sure if I'm gonna make it to her birthday. I'm not gonna get to see her grow up. ''(Cut to different shots of Michelle, then to different shots of Wilber.) 'Wilber: '''I'm weak and tired. I'm just not hungry anymore. ''(Cut to his lifeless body with Catnip Squirrel behind him. Cut to flashbacks of Wilber, him chasing Ralph, then himself.) 'Wilber: '''But I lived a good life. I can't complain. ''(Cut to Wilber's lifeless body, then to different shots of him and Michelle.) 'Wilber: '''She tried to cheer me up and played with her toys around me. '''Woody Toy: '''Yee-haw! Howdy, cowboy! '''Wilber: '''And stuck by my side till the end. I'm gonna miss her. ''(Cut to a tunnel with a flashback of Daffodil.) 'Wilber: '''Everyone always asks: "Did you ever see Daffodil again?" Well, I'll leave that up to you. ''(Cut to Michelle hugging Wilber's lifeless body, then to the living room, then to Wilber's food and water bowls, then to his litter box, then to his bed, then to Vrooom, then to Michelle on a swing at a playground, then to her at a greenhouse, then to her on the swing again, then to her with Wilber's cremation box surrounded by a picture of them, his paw prints, a picture of himself, Catnip Squirrel and a yellow flower, then to her watching a waterfall, then to a close-up of Wilber's cremation box surrounded by a picture of him and Michelle, his paw prints, a picture of himself, Catnip Squirrel and a yellow flower, then to different shots of the picture of Daffodil and Wilber.) 'Wilber: '''Over the years, I realized my story wasn't about finding someone or something. It was about moving on. ''(Cut to different shots of Michelle and two kittens, then to her blowing out her birthday cake.) The End Chapter 15: End Credits DIRECTED BY Chris Evans and Mark Ruffalo | PRODUCED BY Robert Downey Jr. and Susan Downey | WRITTEN BY Paul Rudd and Vin Diesel | PAUL RUDD as the voice of Wilber Bortz | PARAMOUNT ANIMATION and METRO-GOLDWYN-MAYER present | in association with ROUGH DRAFT STUDIOS and TEAM DOWNEY | WILBER'S PENNSYLVANIAN LIFE IN 14 VIDEOS (A picture of Wilber is shown.) '''Closing Logos 2013_Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer_closing_logo.png Paramount_Pictures_Distributed_By_2013.png Category:Film Transcripts Category:Zachary, Grace and Lexia Transcripts